mommy blogging monster is back!hee..

whoa..it has been a while..the past few days has been..oh gosh..it's undescribable if we can have that word huhu..especially the days of last week..huhu..when i think about it..i'd feel the shudder..of terror and wanting to cry huhu..it was aqil's first admission to the children's ward at hospital jerantut..huhu..adeh..

it started as a fever when he has gotten from me on saturday..on sunday it didn't stop and his temperature increased during the night and in fact at 1.15 a.m we brought him to the ER as his temperature tak turun..dah jelung dah bagi medicine masih tak turun..i was afraid of the sawan thing (nauzubillah)..sampai ER terus nurse and MA suruh jirus badan..and the temperature terus turun..a little later we went back home..isnin pagi mula okay..tengahari to petang siap berpeluh lagi..but malam je terus naik dan naik..and at 4 o'clock his temperature was 40.2 and we jirus him and went straight to ER and the doctor came and do check ups and in a blurry mind (caused by no sleep and eating disorder) i walked to the ward and was seated by a bed and at that time i realised..Ya Allah..we are being admitted..a feeling of sadness..frustrations and scared was all over me..i was like..what have i done..why can't i take good care of my baby..what did i do wrong sampai my baby kene masuk ward..isk isk..my husband never left my side and in the darkness (as everyone else was still sleeping) he was consoling me hugging me telling me that everything was gonna be alright.,.and i didn't even put aqil down..he stayed in my arms..i was at the bottom of emotion..then i started to jelung him..my whole body my clothes was soaked wet and my aqil was wearing only his diapers..it was a moment which i could never forget..

but above all of that..i realised a few things from the admission..

*bile suhu naik sangat..jirus anak like mandikan macam tu slowly*

*never hesitate to go the doctor bile rase teruk sangat*

*don't ever wait tunggu je sampai anak sawan*

*not all doctors and nurses in government hospitals are cold (although i've encountered a few nurses yang memang buat diriku menangis)..the doctors were wonderful..and the makcik pencuci also baik sangat2*

*toilet hospital kerajaan walaupun scary tapi bersih sangat*

*i have a few people in my life yang sangat2 baik..my families..my bestfriends aka sisters for life..makcik (nanny aqil)..and mak and abah and adik2..*

*my role as a mother to aqil requires me to be strong physically and mentally..which i would try from time to time to be stronger and stronger..well..i really can't help myself looking at my aqil crying out of pain bile nak cucuk jarum untuk masuk air ke..menangis sebab demam ke..it really touches my heart..adeh*

*i would not have the strenght to go through the thoughest moment ever if it weren't for my darling husband+family+bestfriends..*

thanks to mak, ayah and moktok for taking a two days leave from their work (ayah who is at his busiet and mak..)..my love and thanks to my baby sister for reminding me that i have to be strong and that everything's gonna be okay..thank you to my darling besties aka sisters for life for being with me all the way..thank you to mak abah and adik2 for having the three of us in your family..and thank you to abang..for believing in me..thank you for being with me..thak you for loving me..and thank you for being you..

*i love every single person in my life*

*thank you Allah for all of your blessings*

the first few hours of his fever time

he could still smile mase ni..

in the ward already..no more of his smile and his playful nature..first day at the hospital

first day..baru boleh tidur atas bed..if not was in my arms all the time..

dah discharged and ibu and aqil dah di rumah wiii!!!

at this time..the real aqil was back in action!