Friday, June 22, 2012

Life is beautiful because...

Allahuakbar..my week ended in an excited feeling of having my beloved ones coming over to jerantut...just because we wanted and needed to be with each other i guess..ayah being a workaholic suddenly gets to get a few days off fro the university, with adik man having a long semester break being here in Malaysia for quite sometime..i feel blessed for having them to be healthy and able to travel to our home here in the 'J' town..including our moktok too..thank you Allah..

so the night after their arrival, abang and kakngah decided to have a small barbeque session..ayah asked to invite our beloved abah and family..it was like a masterchef cook off pulak yesterday hehe..and now i am down with a fever flu and coughing siap adeh..but hey..it is worth all what i experienced last night*winkwink*

so i was already feeling uneasy with my running nose and berat kepala..was preparing drinks as abah,mak and adik2 dah sampai..waiting for ayah to come back from the mosque and kakngah picking up abe ngah..i was making 7up+tropicalpunch+water and ice drink (chewwah sempat lagi)..and was looking outside the kitchen window thinking of adik din..since everybody was here i was like best nye if my adik din was here..i missed him a lot lately..been talking on the phone to him quite a lot lately..lately lately..and suddenly...!!i heard everyone outside saying oohh ahhhh as if something wonderful just happened and i turned back..and there he was hugged by abang adik man and i don't know who and i felt numb..and tears dwelled up..he was standing right there..being hugged and yet he was smiling at me..unconciously i literally ran to him and hugged him and cried..ya Allah..i always asked for something good to happen to everyone..and this..happening to my ownself..and others..is beyond good..it was priceless..and the drama went on with tearful mak and surprised moktok and ayah..alhamdulliah..even abah also took part in the whole surprising drama when ayah arrived back from the mosque..hehe..abah yang makin handsome dgn janggutnye..hehe..

anyway..life..spins around for everyone..the moment we celebrate love, joy and presence..there are those who faces loss and picking up the pieces to continue their lives..like my own best friend at school dearest kak maziah..she just lost her husband who was a dear in all of our hearts..Allah..and she was 23 days after having her second baby..and her first is of the same age as aqil..we lost him to lymphoma at the age of 31..my kak maziah kept telling me how she needed me and needed semangat from me..and insyaAllah i will always be with her..all the way..insyaAllah..truth be told,i myself experience great sadness over his death, but i know i have to be strong for her..kept telling myself Allah dah pilih kak maziah because Allah knows kak maziah can endure it all sooner or later..but this few weeks are gonna be tough and i will stand by her..

see how life is? right now, we may feel as if we are some of the luckiest people, having the chance to feel they joy and happiness the world could offer with grants from Allah..but never fail to remind ourselves, we cannot run away from facing the hardships prepared by Allah for us..it is only the matter of solat and doas, being strong inside and out,  love and affection..from the ones we love..

right now, i'm blessed and at the same time i constantly remind myself that these are all from Allah..thank you Allah..ku bersyukur kepadaMu..jauhilah dan lindungilah kami dari segala bala bencana, bala penyakit, segala keburukan dan kejahatan. jika telah tertakdir untuk kami akan dugaan yang telah Engkau janjikan, tetapkan lah iman kami, kuatkan lah diri kami dan kepadaMu kami berserah..amin..

life is beautiful because of all these..we experience joy and happiness because Allah wanted us to learn to be grateful..bersyukur dengan kurniaan Allah..

life is beautiful because when we experience loss, Allah wanted us to learn to appreciate, value and love the people we have in our lives before we lose each other..

do not think that our lives are better just because...or questioning why we are not experiecing the better lives others are having..what Allah has destined for us is insyaAllah..the best for us..Allah works in msyterious and wonderful ways..hanya Allah yang maha Mengetahui..Allahuakbar..

^the boys including the little boy of ours went out for a *boysdayoutbutstrictlyremindedtomakeittobeonlyforafewhours* as we are going back to bukit mendi to ziarah kubur arwah mokwo later today^

~have a blessed weekend everyone~

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

of 'Oh my God' and 'Gosh'

salam..it really has been a while..an update about my life..

just completed my fourth semester in ukm for my masters..one more to go masyaAllah..time flies isn't it huhu alhamdulillah after all the tears and sweats..done my first three chapters of the project paper so it is now time to collect data and analyze! anyway the semester did end with tears lots of them after the final exam paper adeh..heartbreaking and heart wrenching it was..praying hard that it won't hinder what i am aiming for after i graduated..if my PNGK drops then i am so done wuwu huhu..keeping my fingers cross on this one..let my husband's heart be open to the opportunity that we have upon our lives in the years to come..huhu..keep on repeating to him 'This is like my childhood dream abang pleaseeeeeeeee come away with meeeee!!!!'hehe over..;p

like ayah said..when Allah has already granted you with what you've planned for your life, nobody could deny it..huhu..my studies will be continued next year as i had to tangguh for this coming september's semester as that will be my long awaited due date waaa takut takut...!
talking about the upcoming baby..i'm entering my 27th week of pregnancy..lil one's been kicking and diving swimming doing Allah knows what in my tummy and i always worry that this lil one will be bigger than his abang aqil..rase senak more than when i had abang aqil whenever he movesss...yess..it is a 'he' again this time..well tipulah if nak kata i wasn't hoping for a girl..but anyways i am still blessed and i get to give abang aqil a lil brother to keep him busy hehe..asalkan sihat dan sempurna sifat anak ibu Alhamdulillah amin..aih pening sikit jelah cause the house akan lagi bersepah and noisy with all the three boys (including the ayah who sometimes ibu kene ajar about disiplin like a small kid adeh lah)..and aqil..everytime i tell him the baby is going to be a boy he'll go..'noo..baby girlllllll'..sorry sayang..ibu kene beranak lagi lah lepas ni huhu...

anyway..about our little or not so little anymore aqil as he is going to be a big brother sooooonnn..he is growing up so fast..one thing that i am amazed is how loving he is now (at the same time sgt bengkeng jugok) and how he is now uttering phrases and words i used to say to him or in front of him when he was younger (children imitate greatly!)..he is starting to produce certain words and phrases integrating them in his daily speech that his ayah got really amazed at him most of the times..and ibu just goes..well...haha..

anyway..he is ready for more serious learning like the al-Quran using the steps in qiraati and alhamdulillah he knows how to take his wudhu following the steps although tak cukup 3 kali atau berlebihan..hehe..and if he is wearing baju the whole baju seluar sume basah everytime wudhu..solat je tak boleh concentrate lame..alhamdulillah at least he is learning what he is supposed to do step by step..day by day i learn how to be patient and deal with his tantrums (most of the time ibu je berjaya calm him down ayah tak dapat..surrender awal2 lagi)..everytime i say no or membebel or marah2 sayang to him he will say 'ibu tak sayang aqil ke marah aqil..aqil kan sayang ibu..' or when i cook his favourite food 'thank you ibu masak utk aqil sedaplah ibu'..hehe( even your ayah doesn't say those words that well to me sayang..;))..whenever we say 'kenape buat mcm ni' or make a sad face because of his doing he will go 'oh i'm sorry' or if we say i'm sorry to him he would reply 'it's okay' hehe..and everytime i do something for him he never misses saying 'thank you ibu'..and that mothers..is what he imitate from those around him and from what i usually say to him..and yes..oh my god and gosh are some of his favourite phrases..hehe..and again yes..these are the joy of being a mother alhamdulillah..insyaAllah given the chance to have another bundle of joy, the happiness and  joyfulness will be doubled insyaAllah amin...

*have a great weekend everyone..ours are insyaAllah gonna be fun and meaningful as it is a get together for the whole family this weekend..alhamdulillah..*